YouTube? You Ain’t Seen Nuthin’ Yet!
July 25, 2007 at 1:50 pm
Monday’s Democratic presidential candidate debate set two important milestones:
- The establishment of YouTube as an official player in politics; and
- The establishment of the precedent that politicians will answer questions from anyone – even snowmen. In fact, with so many Senators running for president, soon we’ll hear this on Capitol Hill: “I’d like to thank my good friend, the distinguished snowman, Mr. Frosty.”
What’s next?
It’s only a matter of time before other hugely popular websites get in on the action and sponsor their own debates.
Here are likely suspects for hosting future presidential debates – and the questions candidates will probably get:
The Amazon Debate
- What’s your favorite book?
- What’s the last book you’ve read?
- What’s on your nightstand?
- Beach reading?
- Book if you’re by yourself on a deserted island?
- Book if you’re at 1% in the polls?
- Book if you’re caught on video decking an intrusive photographer?
- Do you only care whether your name is in a book’s index?
- The last book you authored – who wrote it?
- To qualify for free shipping, would you care to double the amount you’re already spending with us?
- Why do you think that people who purchased your autobiography are also reading Dr. Seuss?
The Peapod Debate
- Let’s see if you connect with average, every day Americans: How much does a gallon of milk cost?
- How much with tax?
- How much with your bonus shopper card?
- How much if you add the driver’s tip?
- How much if you deduct all the impulse purchases you won’t make by not being there in person?
- How much if you deduct your cost of gas?
- How much for a gallon of vodka, instead?
The Netflix Debate
- Do you prefer widescreen or full screen?
- Do you watch the bonus features?
- With director’s commentary or without?
- Would you ever use your DVD as a coaster?
- Ready to return to Blockbuster?
- Who should win Best Supporting Actress?
- To begin the debate, would you like to thank the Academy?
The EBay Debate
- How much would you pay for this portrait of dogs playing poker?
- How much for this pink flamingo for your front lawn?
- How much for the matching pink flamingo for your back yard?
- How much would you pay for this double-wide?
- How much for this portrait of Al Pacino in “Scarface”?
- How much would you pay for this Pink Floyd album?
- How much would you pay for this freeze-dried Lindsay Lohan spittle?
- Does this look infected to you?
The Monster.com Debate
- What’s your salary range?
- Do you work well with others?
- Why the gaps on your resume?
- Why the gaps in your teeth?
- Did you have spinach for lunch?
- Any felonies you’d like to reveal?
- This is a question from Washington Post opinion-shapers: How’s your cleavage?
The Drudge Report Debate
- Hurricanes: Friends or foes?
- Is it the heat or the humidity?
- Will melting glaciers save this two-headed mouse?
- Will melting glaciers save Hillary Clinton?
- Aliens at Roswell, NM: Forced to land by heavy fog and light drizzle?
- The Lost Continent of Atlantis: Did hurricanes from the Bermuda Triangle cause the demise?
- Can unicorns survive gale force winds – and Hillary Clinton?
- Hot enough for you today?
The Expedia Debate
- Window or aisle?
- May I see your ID?
- Your preferred seatmate: fat guy or screaming baby?
- Do you possess any firearms?
- Do you think it’s funny to joke about airport security?
- Can you tell us your best “Hi, Jack!” joke?
- Have these bags been with you through the entire debate?
The Wonkette Debate
- Do you like your snark with or without post-irony?
- Which giggly naughty words make you laugh?
- What dastardly terrorist does the name Obama sound like? How about Kucinich?
- Can you make fun of this picture?
- Does this look infected to you?
And, of course, the Google Debate: Tell us something we don’t know already know about you. Hint: It’s impossible.





















richard said,
July 25, 2007 @ 2:12 pm
And this will all work so well because so many of the candidates ARE tubes!
Tommy Chong said,
July 26, 2007 @ 10:11 am
Then there’s the “NORML Debate”:
* Papers or pipe?
* Chronic or Panama Red?
* Medicinal or recreational?
* Hair test or piss test?
* Jail or rehab?
Cheers, dude!
Tommy
http://www.norml.org/