Foreign policy fans: prepare to celebrate.  We’ve reached a watershed moment for the craft.  The Council on Foreign Relations has approved Angelina Jolie for membership.

Don’t snicker.  Don’t raid tombs.  This is a good move.  Jolie knows her foreign policy.  No joke.  The sultry actress, already a UN Goodwill Ambassador, has reportedly visited refugee camps in over 30 countries.  In February she wrote an intelligent, cogent op-ed on Darfur for the Washington Post.  She also plays the widow of slain Wall Street Journal reporter Daniel Pearl in the new movie A Mighty Heart.

She may be no Kissinger, but if it’s Hollywood glamour we’re after in our foreign policy expertise, we could have done a lot worse.

The fact is, when celebrities talk foreign policy and foreign affairs, typically the result is less brilliance and more babble.

Back in the early ’80s, for example, casino crooner Wayne Newton was asked if he had any connection to India.  Newton said, “I’m an American Indian. I guess that’s a connection.”

Then there’s Kevin Federline, who last year said, “I want to go to Africa — it’s a place where you can really help people.  And I’m into the safari animals.”

Celebrities are also into France.  Woody Allen put it this way: “The United States and France have been great friends and great, great allies going back many, many years.”  After the Iraq war broke out, Madonna said this to a French audience: “Here in France I feel at home.”   Mon cherie!

Communist Cuba’s no celebrity slouch either.  Steven Spielberg once told a Cuban crowd that Cubans were “exploding with passion and talent and self-respect … I feel so much at home here. I hope to come back many times in the future.”  So too, Canada.  Martin Sheen looked northward to feel at home, saying this in Canada:  “Every time I cross this border I feel like I’ve left the land of lunatics.”

Lunatic indeed.  Only someone with Barbra Streisand’s command of foreign policiy facts can make sense of all the lunacy.  Streisand once asserted that, “During the 2004 election, every time John Kerry’s poll numbers elevated, the government announced a new heightened terror alert and people were once again forced to face the orange color code.”

No wonder James Caan once said, “All actors are ignorant.  They should keep their mouths shut.”   Hello gorgeous!

But they won’t.  Instead we get Sheryl Crow crowing: “I think war is based in greed and there are huge karmic retributions that will follow. I think war is never the answer to solving any problems. The best way to solve problems is to not have enemies.”

If you want good karma from your celebrity foreign policy, look no further than Donnie Wahlberg.  He once said: “I would like to meet Mikhail Gorbachev. I think it would be great to sit in a room with him and talk about the situation in the world and try to make peace.”

Not to mention Madonna, who said this about Wesley Clark: “I think he has a good handle on foreign policy, I think he’s good with people, and I think he has a heart and a consciousness.  He’s interested in spirituality — I mean, those things mean a lot to me.”

Hopefully, unlike other celebrities, Jolie won’t get too full of herself, spiritually or otherwise.  Ricky Martin once told Arab youth: “I promise I will become a spokesperson, if you allow me to, a spokesperson on your behalf.”  And Richard Gere recorded this public service announcement calling on Palestinians to vote: “Hi, I’m Richard Gere and I’m speaking for the entire world. We’re with you during this election time. It’s really important: Get out and vote.”

No, if Ms. Jolie wants to avoid sounding silly, she might consult current partner Brad Pitt for pitfalls of sweeping pronouncements.  Pitt and then-partner Jennifer Aniston said in October 2003: “The past few years of conflict mean that yet another generation of Israelis and Palestinians will grow up in hatred.  We cannot allow that to happen.”

Two years later, Pitt seemed to be back on track, probably with wise Angelina’s help.  The U.S. State Department’s “Washington File” news service noted this in November 2005: “As ambassadors of good will in Washington, actor Brad Pitt and his Mr. & Mrs. Smith co-star Angelina Jolie join a long list of Hollywood celebrities using their looks and star appeal to sway U.S. legislators on issues ranging from free trade to stem cell research to environmental protection.”

Now, Mr. & Mrs. Smith have gone to Washington.  Well, at least Mrs. Smith.  Jolie has the diplomatic juice.  And a politicians’ love for local food.  After visiting Cambodia, she said, “I’ve eaten cockroaches, bee larvae and crickets. You can get them with peanuts inside or with guts.  I like them, they’re really meaty and high in protein.”

Mmmm, bee larvae.  Not your ideal dish of diplomacy?  Consider that these are the right times for a tough-as-nails approach to diplomacy.   And heck, what would you expect from someone who once wore a vial of Billy Bob Thornton’s blood around her neck?  Try that, Kissinger!