A rare opportunity and treat in the glass-enclosed nerve center of Extreme Mortman these days– we’re reading Christopher Buckley’s wonderful new “Boomsday.”  With surgical precision he elevates media, political, and PR cynicism to all-new heights.  Among many shining moments there’s a particular gem on page 81 (don’t worry about plot spoiling, this is one of many delightful tangents Buckley pursues):

On the other side of the walls of the detention center, Cass was playing hearts with a reporter for The New York Times.  The reporter was a fellow inmate.  There were quite a few reporters “on the inside” these days, so many of them that they’d formed their own prison gang.  They called themselves “Pulitzer Nation” and sported henna tattos and do-rags made from expensive hosiery.  Cass’s card-playing partner was a Times reporter who had revealed in her “Letter from Washington” that the CIA had planted a chef inside the French embassy in Washington — no mean feat — who was putting edible listening devices in the torchons de foie gras at state dinners.  She was refusing to reveal her source.

A great read for fans of just about anything political and DC media-related.

Introducing the Oscars ceremony in 1968, Bob Hope joked: “Welcome to the Academy Awards. Or as it’s known in my house, Passover.”

Warning — non-Jews may not get the following jokes. Heck, I wrote them and I don’t get half of them.

Washingtonpost.com announced that Elijah will participate in a special online chat. He’ll answer four questions. Ba-dum.

You know the ten plagues? In my family we had the ten complaints: You don’t call, you don’t write, you don’t visit, I don’t hear from you, would it hurt you to send a note, pollen, hay fever, mold, grass, and trees. Ba-dum.

Moses must have had a big headache. He took two tablets. Ba-dum.

Wow, what a great Seder. I’m stuffed. What time’s the football game on? Ba-dum.

Your mind’s in Hagaddah. Ba-dum.

UPDATE:  At Seder tonight, Jack Bauer asked the four questions.  And anyone who didn’t answer got their fingers shot off.

MSNBC just ran a graphic saying: “The Very Latest.”

Didn’t realize there are degrees to being latest.  What’s after the very latest — even more latest still?

Reminds us of that very oldest Steve Martin gag that starts off:

For about two days now, I have been trying to figure out what is the last thing on my mind. It’s not an easy task because you have to think of all the first things on your mind, then the middle things on your mind, and then there’s a lot of false hopes raised as you just think you’re thinking of something else. …

That’s the latest.  Er, the very latest.  Stay tuned for lesser latest.

AP:

TOKYO — Michael Jackson greeted thousands of U.S. troops and their family members at a U.S. Army base south of Tokyo Saturday, taking a break from days of parties with die-hard fans and well-heeled business people.

Extreme Mortman is a proud booster and judge for the 2007 Funniest Fed Competition — picking the funniest current Federal employee.

Not sure if by current Federal employee they means the contestant must be alive, but we can flesh all that out later.

Meantime, click here for more details.  And watch this space for more Funniest Fed announcements.  Some of you may remember years ago when I worked for the Federal government at HUD.  I was in the Office of Public and Indian Housing, or as I called it then, a double major.

Winemaker Ernest Gallo died Tuesday.  His body will be put in a box — just like his wine.

John McCain announces for president on the Late Show With David Letterman.

Arnold Schwarzenegger announces for governor on The Tonight Show With Jay Leno.

John Edwards announces for president on the Daily Show with John Stewart.

That just leaves Al Gore announcing for president on The Weather Channel.

Sad news: The guy who co-invented the remote control, Robert Adler, died.

Sadder news: His remains were lost somewhere in the couch.

Oh, sorry.  Was just imagining the Dixie Chicks playing North Korea.

Any thoughts on whether (or weather) this is the dumbest question ever asked by a member of the White House press corps?

From today’s briefing with Tony Snow:

Q Presidents may not be able to predict the weather or change the weather, but is there anything that the President has been either briefed on about the current cold wave across the country, or any federal resources that are being brought to bear?

And just for the record, here’s Snow’s response: “I don’t know. I’ll find out.”

Actually, Tony, please don’t.