Rough stuff …

Robert Boyd, Washington bureau chief for Knight-Ridder Newspapers, at the 1984 Vice Presidential debate:

“Congresswoman Ferraro, you have had little or no experience with military matters and yet you might someday find yourself commander-in-chief of the armed forces. How can you convince the American people and the potential enemy that you would know what to do to protect this nation’s security, and do you think in any way that the Soviets might be tempted to try to take advantage of you simply because you are a woman?”

Rougher stuff…

CNN’s Bernard Shaw, 1988 presidential debate:

“Governor, if Kitty Dukakis were raped and murdered, would you favor an irrevocable death penalty for the killer?”

Then there’s this question asked of Barack Obama …

George Stephanopoulos, 2008 Democratic debate:

“Senator, two questions. Number one, do you think Reverend Wright loves America as much as you do? And, number two, if you get the nomination, what will you do when those sermons are played on television again and again and again?”

The roughest stuff?  Hardly.  We align ourselves with what Jake Tapper tells Howard Kurtz:

ABC correspondent Jake Tapper defended his colleagues in an interview, saying: “They were tougher on Obama, yes. He’s the front-runner. By any empirical standard, many members of the media don’t seem to want to ask Senator Obama tough questions, and Senator Obama doesn’t seem to want to answer them. This is the 21st debate. It is the only one where people have complained that the moderators were tougher on Barack Obama than on Hillary Clinton or any other candidate. How on Earth is that possible?”

Good question.  We’re stumped too.

The good, wise folks at Blog P.I. tell me that if I write a nasty blog post about Ron Paul, I might get lots of comments.  So let’s take that theory out for a test drive.

First, let’s get their attention: Ron Paul Ron Paul Ron Paul Ron Paul Ron Paul.  And, for good measure,  Ron Pall.

Second, let’s say this: Ron Paul is not a real Republican.

Third, let’s wonder this: Is Ron Paul crazy?

Fourth, let’s make fun of the gold standard: Oh wait, I can’t do that.  I used to work for Jack Kemp.

Quick question: If you like your presidential candidates saying “global warming,” would you have appreciated more the April 26 Democratic debate or the May 3 Republican debate?

Likewise, if you prefer your presidential candidates saying “climate change” instead, would the Democratic or Republican debate be more to your liking?

The results — and the rhetoric — might surprise you.

April 26 Democrats:

• Hillary Clinton:  “I believe America is ready now for universal health care. It is ready for a new energy policy. It is ready to deal with global climate change.”
• John Edwards:  “On the issue of climate change, we ought to cap carbon emissions in the United States.”
• Bill Richardson: “I would have a major initiative on climate change.”
• Dennis Kucinich: “I think it’s important that we move away from global warming and global warring.”

May 3 Republicans:

• Duncan Hunter:  “Global warming and the need to be energy-independent gives us a great opportunity.”
• John McCain and Jim Gilmore both mentioned “energy independence.” 
• Mike Huckabee split the difference:  “The most important thing about global warming is this. Whether humans are responsible for the bulk of climate change is going to be left to the scientists.”

New Media Strategies measured which Republican presidential candidate got the biggest bump from the May 3 debate at the Reagan library.

As of 3 p.m. on Friday, May 4, views of YouTube videos of footage from the debate show:

• Mitt Romney on top with 16,282 views of multiple videos of him discussing multiple issues. (note – these videos were posted by the Romney campaign)
• In second place: Ron Paul, with a total of 11,090 views (8,142 general highlights, 2,947 of him on going to war)
• The candidates on evolution is the third most watched series of videos – 3,386 from various YouTube postings.
• Others highlights include:
• Candidates on Bill Clinton as First Husband-1398 views from various videos
• Rudy Giuliani on abortion- 1549
• Various Tom Tancredo videos on multiple issues (posted by the Tancredo campaign) :747
• The question posed to Mitt Romney about what he dislikes most about America: 60 views
• Jim Gilmore, Mitt Romney, John McCain on Bin Laden: 40
• Candidates on how they differ from President Bush: 64
• Candidates on tech, environment, and science: 194
• Candidates on women’s rights and abortion: 860
• Candidates on Iran: 254
• Candidates on Iraq: 230
• Duncan Hunter on what government does well (posted by the Hunter campaign): 143

Over the weekend, we here at Extreme Mortman thought we were being clever by using faux “West-Wing”-esque-like language to make fun of actress Melissa Fitzgerald thinking of running for a House seat in Pennsylvania, pending her epiphany of where she actually lives.

Alas, we made the rookie mistake of not including an actual picture of the assistant to C.J. Cregg (Clegg? Craig? Czegg? Sorry, we never really watched the show), which one of our commenters noted.

So without further adieu — or any other fancy faux Aaron Sorkin-esque-like word — please welcome wannabe Congresswoman Melissa Fitzgerald.

With this week’s kick off of the presidential campaign season, it’s worth asking: Do debates this early matter?

For proof that first debates go unremembered, click here.

Not sure which is funnier nostalgia: That yours truly was a moderator, or that the debate “did not garner much media attention as it only drew two candidates.”

Heck, at least I got to meet Morry Taylor.  That’s A-morry!

For a blogger, few things are as magical as someone paying for ad space on your blog.  So you can imagine my thrill to see the e-mail announcement that a new ad would appear on my Extreme Mortman blog.  That excitement intensified when I saw who bought the ad: The Politico, inviting questions for its May 3rd Republican presidential debate at the Ronald Reagan library.

If the Politico is seeking questions from Extreme Mortman readers, clearly they’ve run out of high-concept queries.  I hope the Politico doesn’t mind getting in the weeds with questions like, “Does this look infected to you?” and, “What’s your PIN number?”

It could happen.  Presidential debates, after all, attract some of the weirdest, funniest, and downright silliest questions you’ll ever see in politics.

Here is my list of Top Ten Zaniest Questions Asked At A Presidential Or Vice Presidential Debate.  As the Founding Fathers never said, we laugh because it’s funny, we laugh because it’s true.

10. A member of the audience at a 2000 presidential debate:

“My 6th grade class at St. Claire’s School wanted to ask of all these promises you guys are making and all the pledges, will you keep them when you’re in office?”

9.  Robert Boyd, Washington bureau chief for Knight-Ridder Newspapers, at the 1984 Vice Presidential debate:

“Congresswoman Ferraro, you have had little or no experience with military matters and yet you might someday find yourself commander-in-chief of the armed forces. How can you convince the American people and the potential enemy that you would know what to do to protect this nation’s security, and do you think in any way that the Soviets might be tempted to try to take advantage of you simply because you are a woman?”

8.  CNN’s Bernard Shaw at the 2000 vice presidential debate:

“Our moderator has committed a boo-boo. I asked the sexual orientation question of you. I should not have done that in terms of rotation. Gentlemen, I apologize.”

7.   An audience question from a 1992 presidential debate:

“How has the national debt personally affected each of your lives?”

6.  Barbara Walters at a 1980 presidential debate:

“You have already given us your reasons why people should vote for you, now would you please tell us for this your final question, why they should not vote for your opponent, why his Presidency could be harmful to the nation and, having examined both your opponent’s record and the man himself, tell us his greatest weakness.”

5.  Candidate James Stockdale, 1992 vice presidential debate:

“Who am I? Why am I here?”

4.  Bernard Shaw, again from 2000:

“Dick Cheney, Joe Lieberman, you are black for this question. Imagine yourself an African-American. You become the target of racial profiling either while walking or driving. African-American Joseph Lieberman, what would you do about it?”

3.  CBS’ Bob Schieffer at a 2004 presidential debate:

“The flu season is suddenly upon us. Flu kills thousands of people every year.   Suddenly we find ourselves with a severe shortage of flu vaccine. How did that happen?”

2. An audience question from a 1992 presidential debate:

“Could we cross our hearts? It sounds silly here but could we make a commitment? You know, we’re not under oath at this point but could you make a commitment to the citizens of the US to meet our needs?”

1.And of course, the all-time zaniest question asked at a presidential debate, this opening tickler posed by Bernard Shaw in 1988:

“Governor, if Kitty Dukakis were raped and murdered, would you favor an irrevocable death penalty for the killer?”

Maybe the Politico could bring that question back on May 3rd?  Here then, is my submission: “Mayor Giuliani, if Kitty Dukakis were raped and murdered, would you favor an irrevocable death penalty for the killer?”

Among the many story lines from Hillary Clinton’s boffo first quarter fundraising success: the Internet graduated from campaign novelty to campaign strategic tool.

Check out this paragraph from the Post’s story on the Clinton’s treasure:

She also raised $4.2 million on the Internet during the quarter. Eighty percent of her donations came in amounts of $100 or less.

That’s a critical point that shouldn’t be lost.  This is more than a YouTube moment, more than macaca or Apple.  This is the Internet lowering the acquisition cost for raising money, potentially turning campaign economics on its heads.  Traditional fundraising consultants may not want you to be aware of this, just like traditional media consultants probably aren’t too thirlled about YouTube.  But the Internet right now is changing the way campaigns do business, in the literal sense.

Hillary’s staggering figures are good news for her.  But greater news for Internet politics.

(UPDATE: More here from Donna Bogatin at ZDNet. Good post.)

Lovers of political trivia should rejoice at today’s Washington Post correction:

A March 27 KidsPost article about presidential elections said that 2008 will be the first time since 1952 that neither a sitting president nor a sitting vice president has run for president. President Harry S. Truman and Vice President Alben Barkley each ran briefly for the Democratic nomination in 1952. 

They’re right.  We owe it to the kiddies to set the record straight about the great Alben Barkley.

Maryland’s oldest maximum-security prison, the Maryland House of Correction in Jessup, has closed.

Extreme Mortman reader RichardA, a veteran of Maryland and Maryland-related politics, wonders the fate of the prison’s most famous political prisoner, Willie Horton.

Horton was transferred there on April 18, 1996, no thanks to Michael Dukakis.

No word on Horton’s whereabouts since.  Please remain calm but vigiliant, be on the lookout — and report to your local law enforcement authorities any suspicious looking negative ads.